Tag Archives: Tom Cruise

Going Clear and the Obvious Narcissism of L. Ron Hubbard

4 Apr

Tom Cruise Scientology Cover Photo

I just finished the new HBO documentary Going Clear, and all I can say is: my, oh my.  This terrifying documentary exposes more about Scientology than I ever knew.  What is most clear to me is that Scientology, as a whole, is a product of narcissistic abuse.  If I were to hypothesize anything about its founder, L. Ron Hubbard, it’s that he most likely qualified as someone suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder of the cerebral variety.  Hubbard, who started as a pulp fiction writer, eventually wrote Dianetics, which would become the basis of Scientology and an exploration of what Hubbard called “the modern science of mental health”.  This man made the presumption that his book could overturn centuries of development in the arena of mental health.  When that did not happen, he invented his own religion.

In the last year or so I have been in deep research mode of Narcissistic personality disorder.  The reason for this is because I was in a romantic relationship with someone who I very much believe to be a narcissist.  Within the first few minutes of this documentary, we hear excerpts of letters written about L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology by his second wife, Sara Northrup.  Sara asserted that she only married Hubbard because he had threatened suicide.  This is a very common manipulation tactic for narcissists to use in order to get their way.  She also detailed an account about how Hubbard awoke her from her sleep because she had been smiling, setting him off into a rage because he took it to mean she was thinking about another man.  After they had a daughter, Hubbard took the little girl with him and called Sara to tell her that he had chopped their daughter into tiny pieces and thrown her into a river.  It doesn’t get much more abusive than that.

Going Clear also touches on how the church’s two most famous members – John Travolta and Tom Cruise, became so involved with Scientology.  John Travolta was extremely young when he became involved, and he linked his success in acting with his involvement in Scientology.  The use of “auditing” also becomes very important in the case of Travolta, as it appears that the Church of Scientology threatens members with the release of their deepest secrets collected in such sessions.  Obviously the Church of Scientology has something pretty big on Travolta that keeps him there.

Scientology’s biggest star and supporter is Tom Cruise.  Cruise’s marriage to Nicole Kidman is a major focal point of his story in Scientology.  The documentary mentions that Nicole Kidman’s father was a prominent psychologist in Australia, which David Miscavige, the head of the Church of Scientology, viewed as a threat.  Any psychologist or mental health professional, or any person associated with a mental health professional is deemed to be a “suppressive person” by Scientology.  Scientologists therefore aim to “disconnect” from these suppressive people, of course at almost any cost. Nicole, therefore, was deemed a suppressive person, and her divorce from Cruise was apparently orchestrated by the Church of Scientology.  I have heard further rumors that Cruise’s marriage to Katie Holmes was staged and under contract, but the documentary goes no further than discussing an arranged relationship between Cruise and an actress named Nazanin Boniadi.  There were also rumors that one of the reasons why Holmes divorced Cruise was her fear of their daughter Suri becoming involved in Scientology.  Going Clear also notes that Cruise was not really involved in Scientology during his marriage to Kidman, but in recent years, he has been the absolute most treasured asset of the Church.  Cruise is one of the biggest movie stars of all time, if not the biggest, and Scientology depends on him in many ways.

Going Clear is a truly terrifying look at how Scientology is essentially the result of an egomaniac’s own desire to control others.  This documentary is one of the first looks at some of the extreme abuses allegedly committed by David Miscavige and the Church of Scientology.  Perhaps what is most revealing about the Church of Scientology is its financial value (over one billion dollars) and its real estate investment prowess.  I have driven by the Church of Scientology on Sunset Boulevard in Los Angeles, and it is a menacing sight.  A few people I know have gone inside to take the prerequisite personality tests “as a joke”.  After watching Going Clear, I can say with certainty that there is nothing funny about Scientology and its abuses of its members.

Disappointing Celebrity Penises Throughout History

22 Mar

Penises! You hate what they’re attached to, but by god, you can’t live without them! They’re everywhere! And what sort of penis might everyone like? A celebrity’s penis!

Photos of celebrity penises are highly sought after, though there are reasons why I think this is silly. First off, people seem to assume that a celebrity usually has an impressive, beautiful penis, simply because it may be attached to someone talented and/or beautiful.  This is simply not the case. The truth is that most people have average, functional dicks that get the job done. Whether or not we realize it, celebrities are simply humans, most likely in possession of average penises. Second, what happens to these pictures of penises other than being published in Playgirl (often without permission of male celebrities) and eventually finding a home on an obscure gay porn website? They circulate the gossip websites for a couple of weeks and disappear forever. So in the end, no one cares about your penis. Put that thing away.

Yesterday I chose to give in to the latest celebrity penis hype and took a brief, lazy glance at the leaked photos of Chris Brown’s penis. I take that back. I stared for quite a while. I searched the photograph for hints of tampering. I noted the lighting and the use of a bathroom mirror, most likely in a hotel. But the actual penis in question? Meh. Average! It was probably medically normal and nothing to get excited over, just like most celebrity penises.

This disappointment in celebrity penises is nothing new. Surely there are several disappointing celebrity penis moments throughout history, which we shall now examine:

Disappointing Celebrity Penis #1: Tom Cruise

I'm angsty! Look at me gripping my football as though it were a metaphorical extension of myself! Wah!



Back in the dizzay, Tom Cruise starred in a movie about high school football and teen sex called All the Right Moves. This was really early in his career and he probably did not expect to become a star, so he likely dropped trou without thinking about anything but a paycheck. Overall Assessment: Smaller than average. More of a turn-off: scientology.

Disappointing Celebrity Penis #2: Leonardo DiCaprio

Are you thinking about my penis? Why yes Leo, yes I am.



In another fascinating but rarely seen cinematic moment, my man Leonardo DiCaprio went the full frontal route. Playing gay poet Arthur Rimbaud, Leo flashed his goods for the love of art. Overall Assessment: Average. Would still hit it.

Disappointing Celebrity Penis #3: Daniel Radcliffe

Don't look at us like that. You took off your pants on your own.



I really don’t care to see this one, but from what I’ve heard, Harry Potter is both smaller-than average and a bit, ahem, wild down there, if you will. I think I speak for all women when I say that it is important that men take as much care with their grooming as we often do. I mean, let’s be honest – would any man want to have their face in the equivalent of a buffalo fur? No, they wouldn’t. Overall Assessment: No thank you.

Disappointing Celebrity Penis #4: Brad Pitt

The original example of blonde-haired perfection, William Bradley Pitt.



Some paparazzi photos from a few years back revealed what every person should know: size doesn’t always matter. Case in point: Brad Pitt’s average member. He’s so perfect-looking that it really shouldn’t matter anyway. However, ex-girlfriend Juliette Lewis once said that Pitt was “no BIG deal in bed”. Bitter are we, Juliette? Overall Assessment: If it’s good enough for Angelina Jolie, it’s good enough for me.


Knight & Day: Tom Cruise is Somehow Still Hot.

7 Jul

Tom Cruise, somehow still hot.

While viewing the latest offering from Scientologist/professional couch-jumper Tom Cruise, I could not help but think: damn, Tom Cruise is still hot. I was truly shocked at how well he has managed to preserve both his face and body. (And it hopefully has nothing to so with a weird Scientologist anti-aging practice – eek.) At 48, Tom still has “it,” whatever that “it” is.

Looking at Cruise’s IMDB page, he hasn’t really been in a lot of movies. Apparently, he’s only been in 33 movies in the last 29 years. That seems a little unbelievable for someone who has been called the biggest movie star in the world. I think my favorite Tom Cruise movie has to be a tie between Interview with the Vampire and Mission: Impossible (the first one). Despite what many people may think, Tom Cruise can actually act, and I am definitely looking forward to Mission: Impossible IV (his next movie, due out sometime next year).

But what is Knight & Day about, you ask? It doesn’t really matter. Basically, Cameron Diaz plays a woman who likes restoring cars trying to go home to Boston for her sister’s wedding. And Tom Cruise is a highly-skilled spy who intervenes in her life only to make things much more complicated. The movie also involves a high-tech item that a bunch of bad guys want (typical), Peter Sarsgaard as a villain (even more typical), and lots of explosions and non-believable jumps from far distances (most typical). This movie was very entertaining and did not need to be anything else, really. Plus, it raised my opinion of Tom Cruise, which had been very low for some years now. It was the Scientology recruitment video that had lowered it for me, in addition to the rumor that he stood no more than 5’7″ and wears massive lifts in his shoes. But he was married to Nicole Kidman (a fellow Amazon goddess) and they never looked too ridiculous together in pictures. Katie Holmes is also around 5’10”, so it can’t really be that bad. Cameron Diaz is also very tall, but she and Cruise look at each other eye-to-eye throughout the movie.

Oh, I also wanted to mention that Cruise still does a lot of his own stunts, which impresses me very much for someone who is considered an old man by Hollywood standards. He also has a really good body and the same cute face he’s had forever. I know how gross this probably all sounds, but if you’ve ever had even the smallest inkling that Tom Cruise was at some point and time attractive, Knight & Day will re-confirm that notion for you. Also, it’s just a good summer movie in a sea of failure that Hollywood is dead set on shoving down our throats this year. It has some pretty funny lines and a lot of Tom Cruise action sequences a la Ethan Hunt.

So God bless America for giving us Tom Cruise, his smile, and his bod. But not so much for the craziness.

Grade: B+