Tag Archives: Slut-Shaming

You’re A Whore: God Forbid Women Enjoy Sex

17 Dec

Get it, girl!

God forbid women enjoy sex – that appears to be the general consensus among the greater public. In my 23 years of being a girl, and now a young woman, I have encountered a very prominent distaste for the idea that a woman can possibly enjoy sex and pursue it of her own free will.

Girls are groomed to be trophies: pure and virginal, shiny and new. Any sexual knowledge and/or a drive for sex tarnishes women and leaves them to gather cobwebs at the back of the proverbial bookshelf. A woman’s value is linked to the number of people she’s slept with; the higher the number goes, the more tainted her worth becomes.

How did it come to be that women are judged by such silly standards? Unfortunately, the idea that women are to be thought of as little more than property without the right to decide with whom she is sexual and when, can be traced back to one of the earliest texts still enjoying high circulation today – The Bible. The Bible tells the tale of Eve, Earth’s first woman, who God created from one of Adam’s ribs.  As a product of the flesh of man, Eve was hence the property of Adam, and in her committing Earth’s first sin, she set in motion the whore complex that women continue to battle to this day. The burden women carry for being blamed for the world’s problems stems from the sin of lust – and Eve’s lusting after an apple basically doomed all us women to a life of subservience. Thanks, Eve. Whore.

I have one more qualm with the sexual expectations placed on women. I find it very interesting how women are constantly told that they will not find a man suitable to be a husband in a bar. I enjoy going to bars. Many women enjoy going to bars. Does this make these women any less desirable as romantic partners? Why is it that we are told that the men who go to bars are any worse than the women? Sure, you probably are more likely to encounter sleazy guys at sleazy bars, but there are plenty of normal people in bars as well. I met my latest romantic interest in a bar, and he’s only a little bit insane. With that being said, simply employ common sense when meeting people at bars and clubs. Everyone has at least a little bit wrong with them, and that’s perfectly okay. Looking to get laid is different from looking for a long term romantic partner.

Avoiding being labeled a whore would likely entail living a monastic life in the rolling hills of Lichtenstein. Many people (mostly men) gain some sort of power trip by referring to women as sluts and whores, and ignoring them is your best defense. (Or a taser, which are illegal in most states.) Slut-shaming is NEVER okay, and you can do your part to eliminate the verbal abuse of women by correcting those who use such derogatory terms in reference to women.

So ladies, if you’re looking to get some, go get some and pay no mind to the haters. And always be sure to practice safe sex.

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The Duke “F*ck List”: Thoughts and Consequences

13 Oct

 

Duke: Home of the Blue Devil, and an endless supply of hot men.

 

Last week, Jezebel posted the Duke University “Fuck List,” created by student Karen Owen, in its entirety. The “Fuck List” consists of 42 Powerpoint slides complete with pictures, charts, and thorough descriptions of the sexual performance of thirteen different young men, all of whom happen to be Duke athletes. The Fuck List entertained me more than anything I have had the chance to read in recent weeks, and it shed clarity on what appears to be a continually disputed idea: are women as vigorous in their quest for sex as men, and if they are, should they be allowed that right? Of course the answer to both parts of that question is yes, and the “data collection” performed by Ms. Owen is little more than a visual representation of a common occurrence among young women and men alike – people are having sex and talking about it, and this should hardly be news.

Owen, who titled her Powerpoint “An education beyond the classroom: excelling in the realm of horizontal academics” (quite a clever title, indeed), ranked her 13 “subjects” in the following categories: physical attractiveness, size, talent, creativity, aggressiveness, entertainment, athletic ability, and bonus points (“Bonus points were given for extraneous factors, such as the presence of an Australian accent and/or professional surfing skills. Points were deducted for rudeness or being Canadian.”) Now, call me cynical, but isn’t it COMPLETELY NORMAL to either discuss these details with close friends and/or record them for future entertainment? Owen’s creation of a detailed Powerpoint presentation is no different from the sex gossip that covers college campuses – the only difference is that someone found her creation highly entertaining, and chose to forward it to other friends in a fateful email.

Now Ms. Owen is facing a slut-shaming barrage from various media outlets, including both NBC and Fox News. The treatment of the “fuck list” in the media is sensationalist, with clear aims of portraying Owen as a sex-hungry young woman with no respect for any of her sexual partners. But let us pause for a moment, and imagine, if you will, that the Duke “Fuck List” was the work of a young man. There would likely be backlash from women’s rights groups and feminist media outlets (I will include Jezebel in this category), in addition to interviews with female celebrities expressing their “anger and outrage.” Many recent TV interviews with Duke students show an amused student body, entertained at the fact that Owen was sure to include penis size comparisons and indications of lame and/or inattentive lovers. But would students (especially female students) be entertained at a ranking of tit size or blow job ability? Perhaps they would, but my judgment says no. There is a clear double standard when it comes to sexual promiscuity. Men are encouraged to fuck as many chicks as possible, while women are cautioned away from enjoying sex as they please. Women are continually discouraged from pursuing sex, and when they do, they are labeled “sluts,” “whores,” and “ho’s,” while their male counterparts receive high-fives.

The media is portraying Karen Owen as a real-life biblical harlot and one gem of a video clip comes directly from Fox News, in which Megyn Kelly offers her sage advice to young girls everywhere:

http://www.youtube.com/v/8Whnt3zn-k4?fs=1&hl=en_US

See girls? It’s that simple! Do not sleep around! It’s dirty! Of course we would be lead to believe by Fox News that Ms. Owen is a huge slut deserving of little more than the recognition that she is a slut!

Ms. Owen is a normal young woman who has been blessed with a sex life that appears to be something out of a series of Harlequin romance novels. I am firmly in the camp that feels Owen deserves at least a book deal, or perhaps some sort of sex advice show. Any woman who can enjoy sex and have a sense of humor about it is golden. She also bagged a lot of hot, athletic men, for which I give her props. If Ms. Owen were a man herself, she’d be receiving high fives from all of her male friends and sneers from women. But in this world, and according to most media outlets, Ms. Owen is little more than a disrespectful slut deserving of shame. If being a “slut” entails enjoying a healthy and fun sex life, then I’d take being a slut any day.