Cape Fear Comedy Festival This May!!!

15 Apr

I will be performing stand up at the Cape Fear Comedy Festival from May 17th through May 20th, in Wilmington, North Carolina.  Apparently this is where Dawson’s Creek used to be filmed, but I was too young to really care about James Van Der Beek, so that’s not what I will be thinking about while there.  Instead, I will be focused on brings some hot minutes to the south!  You can find more information about the festival here.

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I’m Making My Stand Up Comedy Debut in Portland Next Week

11 Feb

I’m going on a mini-tour of Portland next week.  Full information and dates can be found on my website at unrulymarulli.com.  Should I wear a wig on this tour?  I just might.  Who knows.

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Thoughts on the End of 2016

31 Dec

Last night I saw the new Mike Mills film 20th Century Women, starring Annette Bening, Greta Gerwig, and Elle Fanning.  At one point in the film, Fanning’s character remarks that she believes the best quality a person can possess is strength.  Looking back on the last few years of my life, I can easily say that strength is what has brought me to the present day.  A few years ago, I moved to LA after the death of my boyfriend Dave.  I was thoroughly depressed and lost.  I was unsure of what the future held.  Things got even worse for me when I entered an abusive relationship, the worst details of which I have never shared with another soul.  Fast forward to the end of 2015, after breaking free of those horrifying bonds.  It look me a few more months to completely rid my mind of the negative thinking associated with being in such an insidious situation, complete with emotional and verbal abuse.

In the year that has followed, it has been my strength that has truly emerged as my most valuable quality.  It was strength that allowed me to move forward when I lost my best friend to death; it was strength that pushed me to find freedom from someone who had broken me; it was strength that allowed me to forge a new life in Los Angeles.  Strength is what propels me forward; we can all be more strong.  In the upcoming year, we will have to be.

2016 was a great year for me.  I accomplished many things in stand up, including performing in my first major festival and making my debut on Roast Battle, which lead to other amazing opportunities.  I feel my growth not only as a comic, but as a woman.  At the age of 27, I think I really began to feel like a real woman.  I became someone who had seen things, felt pain, known heartbreak, felt despair.  Throughout my life (beginnging in childhood I’ve been pushed down by others, insulted for things outside of my control, and hurt.  But I can say that I always get up again.  I will keep doing the same thing in the future.  Strength is the most important quality of all.

As I head into 2017 and my 30th year, I have a great life.  I have family and friends who love me. a great job that provides for me, a blossoming career in stand up, and I’m dating someone who treats me with total respect.  A lot can change in a year.  Have faith that it will if you are in a low place.  Get back up and keep moving.  Be strong.  Blessings in 2017 and beyond.

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La La Land Was Bad

31 Dec
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Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone looking very bored in La La Land.

Wow, people really seem to love La La Land.  People love this movie so much that it was actually difficult to find a decent seat in a theater in LA the last few weekends to see it.  What’s going on here?  Why do people love La La Land? What am I missing?

Here’s the thing with me – I often find myself unable to find the suspension of disbelief necessary to properly enjoy a musical.  I am a bit of a misanthrope and I simply find it difficult to believe that humans would jump into song and dance at any moment.  This is for good reason, as I have never seen anyone jump into song and dance in my entire short life.  I have never seen song and dance routines taking place in the post office, restaurants, or on the freeway in traffic.  However, if a song and dance routine played out upon a Los Angeles freeway sounds intriguing, La La Land is the film for you.

Damien Chazelle’s brightly colored film centers on the story of Mia Dolan (Emma Stone), an aspiring actress who works as a barista in a Warner Brothers lot cafe, and Sebastian (Ryan Gosling), a brooding aspiring jazz musician who pays the bills by playing corny piano tunes in restaurants.  The opening scene of the movie is a song and dance routine enacted  by the bored motorists of Los Angeles.  Not only was the song forgettable and useless, but the scene bothered me for another reason.  Apparently the only freeway that Chazelle was able to shut down was the 105, which runs east to west and is located several miles south of Pico Boulevard, running west toward LAX.  Pico Boulevard is relevant here because the people in the film most likely would balk at the idea of traveling south of that street.  They are that lame and self-protective.  To see a collection of people singing and dancing atop the 105 freeway, which runs atop one of the most dangerous and deadly neighborhoods in all of Los Angeles (Westmont), is truly disturbing.  The routine ends when Mia fails to realize that traffic is moving ahead, and Sebastian, perhaps in the only realistic moment of the film, cuts her off and unwittingly gives his future lover a dirty look.

One of the themes of this film is of course love, but I think what is most important about the twist in La La Land is that it does have some cynicism within it.  If anything, this movie would have been better with even more cynicism.  There was something so boring about both Mia and Sebastian, and when you put them together, it’s like watching two pieces of toast fall in love with each other just because the other one is there.  Mia wants to be an actress (duh) and Sebastian wants to be a jazz musician (okay so why isn’t he in New York), but they both are boring and flat characters with no real motivations for doing anything.

Perhaps the most pointless scene in the film comes when Mia gets angry with Sebastian for having to tour with a band nearly nonstop.  She asks him if he likes the music that he’s playing.  Sebastian isn’t sure.  The scene then escalates over this nothingness of a conflict.  Mia is mad that Sebastian will have to keep going out of town while making a living playing music.  Who cares if he doesn’t love what he’s playing?  Who is paying the bills in this relationship?  Is Mia’s job as a barista supporting them?  It makes no sense as to why this scene would serve as the rising action of the film.  Mia is mad at Sebastian for being a responsible adult.  Horrifying.  It then gets even worse, but I will leave the rest of the details a mystery.

There are some redeeming, enjoyable scenes.  The dance scene that took place in Griffith Observatory is perhaps the most memorable.  Most others are forgettable and lacking imagination.  Throughout the film, Chazelle appears to be paying homage to the film musicals of the past, but never quite as strongly as the actual musicals originally did it.

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Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling look very bored here.  Appropriate!!!

La La Land also appears to have been slapped together in a short amount of time.  The choreography is very basic and both Gosling and Stone seem stiff.  The ending of the film is perhaps the only redeeming sequence and the only part that gave me some inkling of emotion.  However, I do not think many people will be satisfied with the ending.  In fact, the woman next to me let out a big shrug and exhaled deeply, like she was glad to be done with something taxing.

It did not feel as anyone in the audience was moved throughout this film.  There is a very strange disconnect between the audience and the characters of Mia and Sebastian.  Let’s face it – Mia and Sebastian are carbon copies of stereotypes of stereotypes of what women and men in LA are like.  They are self-absorbed, boring, vapid, and singularly focused on their alleged careers.  This stereotype is true for the most part – people in LA are self-obsessed.  And the ending to this film, in a way, confirms this.  This is perhaps the only redeeming moment of the film – the ending.

Overall, I give La La Land a 4.5 out of 10.  Would not watch again unless it was on TBS ten years from now and nothing else was on.

Last Shows of 2016!!!

18 Dec

Wow, what a year it’s been.  I know that most people are over 2016, but I am cocky enough to say that I had a great year!  It’s still 2016, and I still have more shows.  Come out and support live comedy!

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Thoughts on the Eve of the Election and Why I’m With Her

8 Nov

I am genuinely frightened at the prospect of a Trump presidency.  The very thought that a racist, misogynistic, narcissistic demagogue could possibly be elected President of this country should frighten us all.  However, we still do not live in a world where every person can see the clear error in Donald Trump’s ways. Today, on November 8, 2016, I will cast my vote for Hillary Clinton.

When the election first got underway, I was pro Bernie.  I voted for Bernie in the primaries, and proudly.  I found his brash, honest way of speaking to be refreshing.  But then, the reality set in.  Bernie was not electable by many segments of the American population.  As his defeat in the primaries was clear, I at first was angry at the prospect of voting for Hillary Clinton.  I am still unsure why this is, but I do have to attribute part of it to internalized misogyny.

As a young woman, I have been very lucky.  I was always told I could do whatever I wanted if I put my mind to it.  Even my father, with whom I do not have the best relationship, told me that I could do anything.  He said that the quality he admired most about me is that no matter what, I get back up and try again.  He admired my persistence and drive.  I took this to heart.  I went to college and double-majored.  I interned at NBC.  I started this blog to express my unapologetic feminist thinking.  I am a stand up comedian and a pretty good one at that – in a world where stand up is seen as a man’s game.  I am living a life that women in many other countries are not privileged enough to lead.  I know that without the sacrifice and bravery of many women before me, this would not have been possible.  Hillary Clinton is one of those women I should thank.

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However, I was still angry about voting for Hillary until very recently.  People who I consider my friends (women at that) urged me to watch anti-Clinton propaganda in tee form of a “documentary” called Clinton Cash.  This film, produced by employees of Breitbart, did nothing but attempt to smear the critical life’s work of Hillary Clinton.  Hillary has served the public many times over – as a public defense attorney, as First Lady of Arkansas and the U.S., as a Senator of New York, as Secretary of State.  And yet, it all comes down to one thing for some people – she’s a woman and therefore she’s a shrew, a bitch, evil, cunty, a witch, a whore, etc.  These are the words that people use to describe women in positions of power.  Why?  Because women in power are threats.  Women in power must be silenced.  Women in power are not deemed fit for public consumption.  I’ve been fed this lie and shamefully believed it myself.  As I get older, I see how our society attempts to shape women into obedient little girls.  None of us should stand by idly.  Today, I see no other more responsible option as a citizen than voting for Hillary Clinton.

I vividly remember a moment in my third grade class at Skyway Elementary School in 1996.  My teacher at the time, Miss Burke, is leading a discussion on the election, which at the time is taking place between President Clinton and Bob Dole.  Miss Burke says that she wants to see a black man become President in her lifetime.  She then says it would be even more amazing to see a woman become President.  This memory is so vivid in my mind – only twelve years later, we had our first black President.  I proudly attended the 2008 Inauguration, braving the coldest, most bitter winter of my memory in order to see Barack Obama sworn in at the Capitol.

I was raised by a proud Democrat mother. I was taught from a young age to recognize the values that form the fabric of our country – equality, justice, aid for the sick and poor, and the championing of women and minorities.  I am unapologetically liberal.  I am unapologetically feminist.  I am strong, I am independent, and I am fierce. I’m with her.

#ImWithHer

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Special Announcement: Idaho Laugh Fest 2017

25 Sep

I have a fun announcement – I will be performing at the 4th Annual Idaho Laugh Fest from January 12th through January 15th, 2017!!!  The festival will take place in Boise and will feature a range of comedians from across the country.  A few friends I know from Los Angeles will also be there!  Show dates and further information is pending!

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Mystery: is Jared Leto Attractive?

15 Aug

Yesterday I saw the new DC Comics movie Suicide Squad.  Overall, it wasn’t very good.  In fact, I have a lot of problems with it.  Perhaps my biggest problem after seeing the movie is that I am now faced with a dilemma that haunts me: is Jared Leto attractive?  I have never been attracted to Jared Leto before.  I had zero opinions on Jordan Catalano.*  I saw him in Fight Club when I was twelve, but my loins only burned for Brad Pitt.  I saw 30 Seconds to Mars live in 2012.  I bought all of their albums and enjoyed them.  But was I attracted to Jared Leto as he sang in an allegedly haunted old theater in Colorado Springs? I don’t think so.  No, in fact, I know so.  I have never been attracted to Jared Leto.

But yesterday, something changed.  Perhaps it’s a visceral change that took place within my body, in an involuntary manner.  But it finally happened.  I was attracted to Jared Leto.  He was in costume.  He was in full-body makeup.  His hair was dyed lime green.  He was wearing a very strange silver “grill,” as the kids would say.  He had a face tattoo that said “damaged”.  There was no denying it in this moment.  I was in love for two hours.  I am upset that most of the Joker’s scenes were cut from the movie.  I want to know more.  I need to see more. I yearn, I pine, I scream inside, for this….

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I forgot about this too…

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Let the record show that on August 14, 2016, I, Heather Marulli, was finally attracted to Jared Leto.  This is a day for the history books.

*I did, however, have very strong opinions on Heath Ledger and I probably watched 10 Things I Hate About You and A Knight’s Tale hundreds of times because he was indeed, an undeniably beautiful man.  However, I did not find Ledger attractive as the Joker.

Watch Me in This Promo for “Jeff Ross Presents Roast Battle”

2 Jul

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Yes, that is me standing mere inches away from Jeff Ross, the Roastmaster General.  He is an amazing comic and a great person to work with, and I love that I got to be a part of making this promo for the new Comedy Central show, “Jeff Ross Presents Roast Battle”.  The show will feature some amazing comics, including friends like Olivia Grace, Alex Hooper, Leah Kayajanian, Earl Skakel, and more.  The show premieres July 28th on Comedy Central!!!

Also as an FYI, my next Roast Battle will be on September 13th at 10:30 PM against Danielle Perez at The World Famous Comedy Store!

See Me Perform at the Hudson Valley Comedy Festival from June 30th to July 2nd

27 Jun

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This weekend I will be performing in Kingston and Saugerties, New York as a part of the Hudson Valley Comedy Festival.  Here is where I will be:
Thursday, June 30th at 7:00 PM
Festival Kickoff Early Show
BSP Lounge, 323 Wall Street, Kingston, NY 12401
Friday, July 1st at 6:00 PM
Odd Comics at Odd Fellows
Odd Fellows Temple – Art & Theater Space
220 Main Street, Saugerties, NY 12477
Saturday, July 2nd at 7:30 PM
Jokes and a Movie Late Show
Movie at 7:30 PM, Comedy at 9:30 PM
Seven21 Media Center
721 Broadway, Kingston, NY 12401